If I open both of my eyes
I'll still see an empty space so empty.
But if I keep them closed,
there's still a chance something is out there
- Frozen Creek, Circa Survive
That's how I feel a lot about other things. Probably more so recently regarding relationships and "love" in general.
I'm afraid to open myself up and allow that possibility or even pursue it, because there isn't anything there. The fact that I don't leaves that mystery of what if... it leaves me wondering if someone out there is capable of loving me, or if I'm capable of loving them.
Sometimes, it hurts less than the truth y'know?
The worst part is I know it's not healthy.